The Guilt. My brother is takin care of my mother. Living under the same house as with my nieces and his wife. I justify my exit to the east coast with this assumed safe haven. I want to believe that they won’t miss me. That my destructive self-worthlessness would be justified. But they love me, and they miss me.
So my brother is physically taking care of my mother. I know as my mother ages, the responsibility to take care of her will be greater. And I don’t think that I will be able to take care of her from this end of the country. I can’t think about what may happen in the future and things are so unclear and it is hard to think that my mother is moving closer and closer to death……..